Don’t Let Your Feelings Drive the Bus: Better to let Your “Wise Mind” Take Charge During and After Your Divorce
Divorce/divorcing can bring out intense unresolved feelings. During the process and afterward, it is not unusual to feel anger, hurt and sadness. Guilt and blame may be strong. In addition, there is normal grieving over the loss of our dream of how we thought the relationship and our life would be. With all this emotion and intensity, we can lose our perspective as to what is in our best interests or, for that matter, our children’s best interests.
During life transitions such as divorce when we are feeling upset and highly emotional, basic survival instincts kick in. We go into “fight or flight.” We may perceive a threat to our survival. Realistically, often in divorce, we are actually facing high stakes and potential losses of all kinds. Fear is understandable.