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“It’s Father’s Day! What do I do?”: A Tip for Divorced Mothers

So, as a divorced single parent, you are probably working double duty to raise your kids, run your household and earn a living.  The kids’ dad may see them regularly and may even be participating in their lives in a very positive way.  Or, maybe he is not.  Either way, you are faced with what to do as your kids face holidays which honor their father.  We are talking about Father’s Day, their dad’s birthday and any other days your family has traditionally celebrate

If you and your “ex” were still together, it is likely that you, as the Mom, would take your kids out to buy cards and gifts or help them get together materials to make their own. Depending on their ages and their wishes, you would probably be sort of a facilitator.  You might remind them about the holiday, transport them to stores, depending on their ages pay for whatever they chose for gifts and make the experience of honoring their dad positive and even fun.  As a result, it is likely the kids would feel engaged and proud as they participated.

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When All Else Fails, Lower Your Expectations.

No Need to be a Super Woman Any More

“When All Else Fails, Lower Your Expectations” was a bumper sticker I found when I was working on my dissertation, commuting to school, raising two little kids and generally too busy.  I found the sentiment helpful and you may too.

As a woman going through divorce or re-emerging afterward, you owe it to yourself to reconsider the expectations you hold for yourself.  This is especially true if you are a perfectionist fighting to maintain your perfectionism even if you are extremely busy.  From the outside, you may look like Super Woman.  However, on the inside, you may feel stressed, frazzled, overloaded, and overwhelmed.

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Gratitude Journal.

Spiritual seekers name Gratitude as one of the qualities which raise our vibration and bring us closer to Enlightenment.

I like that idea.  However, today, in this article, I am writing about gratitude as a modest but helpful way to boost our energy and self-esteem.

No matter what life has handed us, gratitude helps us to feel warm, positive and hopeful.  When it comes from others, we feel appreciated and supported.  When we give it to ourselves, we feel worthy, encouraged and whole.  Remembering to focus on gratitude is a simple and uplifting practice that helps us to appreciate who we are and also helps to build our self-esteem. Read more

There is Always Time for a Smile.

So, you are working to GET THROUGH/RECOVER from your divorce, REDISCOVER who you are and of course, MOVE ON.

That is wonderful! Remember, it takes time. However, with commitment, it is definitely something you can do.

Now, let’s not get so serious that we forget to smile. It is important to remember that smiling, laughing and having fun will accelerate the process of recovery and help you feel better, too. Research has shown that when we make a half smile, our brains release chemicals (serotonin and endorphins) which help us feel uplifted and positive. Smiling not only helps us feel good, but it also improves our mood.

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I am not a failure!

Finding Your Divorce Affirmation

At some point, almost every woman who goes through a divorce says, “I feel like a failure.” Self-doubt is a common reaction to divorce. This self-doubt occurs more often in women than it does in men. This is true even though after age 40, more women than men initiate divorces.

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